it is over - for better and for worse. I cry anyway I guess I should expect that. If only he wasn't on the other side of the wall where I work. I hear him laughing and living his new life without a care. So I am getting a new kitchen the home I just bought last fall. I have learned to use a snow plow. I have a great handyman. I have no room or desire in my life for another relationship. My little wee ones are all I have time for - I am it for them. I wish I would walk up to him and just karate kick the crap of of him and walk away. I wish that was acceptable behavior

OMG Yvonne, I can't imagine having to work right next to him. You poor thing, I don't know how you can handle that. I haven't seen mine since he left on 12/29. I just know if I do I'll lose it, and not in an angry way. We're closing on the sale of our house on 3/5 and I've even asked for seperate times so I don't have to see him. The whole closing is going to be bad enough. I was angry a few days ago, but depression is setting in a little again. I guess that's going to happen as the house gets emptier and emptier, and then again as I walk out the door for the last time, and again at the closing, and again having to call my parent's house home for a while. It's going to be a lonely weekend, my daughter is going to Maine to visit relatives so I have to find things to keep me busy. I can't think of being in another relationship either, but it would be nice to have someone to hold me. I miss not being close to someone.

Hold you? well I coined the phrase "not a hug" for the affection I was given. I got used to the starvation. Should be grateful as there is nothing to miss there. I went through a closing to buy this house. I cried the whole time while he sat next to me mumbling how buying a house should be a happy time...OMG. I am so sorry for what you are going through. For what all of us in this situation are forced to bear. It is unbelievable. You will get through it. rise up to each challenge. cry as you need to and then let the anger continue - I cry on the way to the office. I cry over my work. my tears smear the pages. I pull it together for important stuff. I remind myself I can do anything for a temporary time. I look ahead when I can move to another office. I make sure I am successful despite him. I do hate him.

It's Valentine's Day and I really didn't think it mattered, that it was just another day, but I remember so many when I got a special something from my "special someone." It's just weird, you know, after so many years together with someone and thinking you had a connection of love. I know in my heart that I had something to do with the change in our relationship but in really exploring and analyzing what and how it happened, I can't ever take the blame and responsibility for it crashing as it did. He said we shouldn't part and when I asked why, he said "because we have history." Not the right answer! I needed and need a committed relationship with love and respect and will not accept anything less! None of us should! May our future Valentine's Days be filled with much love, self-respect, honor and following our "North Star" (our true selves)!

Divorce is final still trying to sell some items to pay joint bills as agreed in the divorce settlement.I do fine until he calls and I hear his voice, it just hurts too bad. It seems to be OK with him. I finally told him not to call but to text I just can"t handle hearing his voice. But I hear it my sleep every night.